I realised the other day when I was contemplating a visit home to Australia that I haven’t spoken a lot about the downsides of living abroad – don’t get me wrong, there aren’t many – I’ve lived abroad now for 6 years and love it even more now than I did then, but I have to be honest and say that sometimes it can be tough. Really tough for some people – and once that excitement of the first few months wears off and you realise what you’ve done it can feel isolating and a little scary.
Living abroad is sort of like a marathon – a marathon which lasts as long as you’ll let it, which is hopefully long enough for you to ‘give it a good go’ and come to know a new culture, make new friends and flourish as an independent soul. There’s the first bit when everything is fun and you feel like you never want to go home, but when that first winter hits, a friend leaves or you miss a big event back home your old life can feel a million miles away. You might really want to make it home for Christmas but you can’t get the holiday or ticket prices are through the roof (these two I can particularly relate to!).
These things are going to happen, so the key is to relish it – for me that’s embracing a cold winter and enjoying Christmas with my ‘London family’. It sounds funny I know, but enjoy all the time you spend living abroad, good and bad – trust me, it will make you stronger when you look back on it later.
This feeling of something being not quite right can manifest itself in many ways – loneliness, severe homesickness or just feeling a bit ‘blah’. We’ve all been there – it happens. Before moving to London I always worried that I would be homesick, and the truth is I was at times, but it’s never bad as you think it’s going to be. Simply the fact that you’ve moved abroad intrinsically proves to yourself that you can cope, so don’t listen to the negative thoughts, just the one telling you that you know will pull you through.
Laugh, say yes to everything, be open and live your life and these feelings become more and more far apart in frequency as you start to adapt to your new life.
The point of this post is not to list all the hard things about living abroad, but to prepare people for what lies ahead – as with anything in life, it’s never 100% smooth sailing, but wrapping yourself in cotton wool is not going to protect you from it, so get out there, live in as many places as you can and take travel and your life by the horns. After all, in 20 years time you won’t remember the hard times, you’ll be too busy flicking through your travel albums reliving all the fun you had that time you lived in X, X and X – how many people can say that about their lives?
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I agree with everything here! Living abroad is definitely a marathon of sorts, and it gets lonely sometimes, especially around the holiday season! I spent last Christmas in London actually, oddly enough. And I embraced my temporary “London family” for the festivities, and you know what – those will be memories I’ll cherish forever, too. I wrote a post a few weeks ago about the sad truth of solo travel, and some things I said there echo what you’ve said here. I haven’t published it because I don’t want people to be turned off the whole going-somewhere-alone-and-living-abroad thing, but maybe I’ll reconsider now. It’s important to know the good and bad, and even more important to embrace both sides of the coin! Great post!
Exactly!
I haven’t moved abroad, but I have moved across the continent twice to places where I knew (almost) no one… Such moves are definitely an adventure. The beginning is exciting, then you hit the lull of it’s-dull-and-I-hate-this-place-I-should-move-back, then you reach a midpoint between the two… Some days are excellent, some days you wish you were ‘home.”
🙂
I’ve lived abroad as an American in Sydney for close to two years. I love this line; “Laugh, say yes to everything, be open and live your life and these feelings become more and more far apart in frequency as you start to adapt to your new life.”
Hi Lauren, thanks – glad youre enjoying Sydney!
Thanks Kristina, you should definitely publish your post – I think people appreciate the honesty! All the best! : )
Hey Nicole,
It’s great that you’ve taken the time to think about some of the downsides of living abroad. Often people get so excited about going overseas they don’t anticipate some of the challenges they might face.
It feels scary to live abroad but at the same time it feels exciting since you get to live in a different place with a different culture and people you do not know. I also wanna try living in other country. I think in that way I will feel independent. Thanks for sharing!. XD
Thanks Angel!
Great post! I used to think it would be so much easier if you could just pop home from London (back to Aus) every now and again, and it would totally combat that homesickness and winter blues!
Acknowledging that you are going to feel homesick, and just work on self care is the key – seek out that store that sells Twisties in Clapham, call home a little more that you normally do, give yourself a Europe weekend away to boost your resolve for being there.
I honestly want to live abroad. But of course I know that it is really tough. That’s why I’m planning to study the cultures and tradition of the place where I want to live so I could enjoy living there comfortably.
H Sherry, great idea! Best of luck – Im sure you’ll be living your dream sometime soon!
At least you speak the language!